Friday, October 4, 2013

BLOG TOUR: EXCERPT: MY EX FROM HELL by Tellulah Darling





Title: My Ex from Hell
Series: The Blooming Goddess, #1
Author: Tellulah Darling
Publisher: Te Da Media
Publication Date: April 1, 2013
Tour Hosted by: Xpresso Book Tours

SUMMARY

Sixteen-year-old Sophie Bloom wishes she’d been taught the following:
a) Bad boy’s presence (TrOuBlE) + teen girl’s brain (DraMa) = TrAuMa (Highly unstable and very volatile.)
b) The Genus Greekulum Godissimus is notable for three traits: 1) awesome abilities, 2) grudges, and 3) hook-ups, break-ups, and in-fighting that puts cable to shame.

Prior to the Halloween dance, Sophie figures her worst problems involve adolescent theatrics, bitchy yoga girls, and being on probation  at her boarding school for mouthy behaviour. Then she meets bad boy Kai and gets the kiss that rocks her world.

Literally.

This breath stealing lip lock reawakens Sophie’s true identity: Persephone, Goddess of Spring. She’s key to saving humanity in the war between the Underworld and Olympus, target numero uno of Hades and Zeus, and totally screwed.

Plus there’s also the little issue that Sophie’s last memory as Persephone was just before someone tried to murder her.

Big picture: master her powers, get her memories back, defeat Persephone’s would be assassin, and save the world. Also, sneak into the Underworld to retrieve stolen property, battle the minions of Hades and Zeus, outwit psycho nymphs, slay a dragon, rescue a classmate, keep from getting her butt expelled from the one place designed to keep her safe …

… and stop kissing Kai, Prince of the Underworld.

My Ex From Hell is a romantic comedy/Greek mythology smackdown. Romeo and Juliet had it easy.



EXCERPT

The tigers herded me along for about fifteen minutes over soft, spongy ground with the occasional tree root to stumble over. Nothing slithered or skittered over my feet, for which I was profoundly grateful.
We stepped into a clearing in front of a large, clear pond with a waterfall. It was beautiful here. I almost forgot about my keepers until one of them pawed at me gently. I jumped at the slight rasp of its claws on my skirt and glared at it.
“You prefer lunch with a view?” I asked the tigers, pleased with my bravado. They sat down, hemming me in along the shore of the pond.A woman began to sing. Not in Greek. Not a hymn or a chant or a lullaby.
Nope. She sang of how her loneliness was killing her. Which sounds poetic, but was actually Britney Spears.
Another woman joined her. And another.
It was the best unplugged cover of “Hit Me Baby One More Time” that I’d ever heard.
Three young women swam out from behind the waterfall. They looked like triplets, with dusky olive skin, and long black hair all threaded through with silvery flowers that glinted as they caught the sunlight. Their voices soared as they entreated the object of their song to give them a sign.
My toes were tapping. And yeah, I hummed along. Whatever. It didn’t get to be a massive hit without being catchy.
The Diana Ross of the group swam forward and held out her hand.As if. I wasn’t jumping in.One of my feline jailers nudged me hard enough to push me in.Instead of being wet, I found myself floating underwater but in the air. The
women continued to sing, starting their song again as they somehow plucked orchids which did usually not grow underwater to weave in my hair.
By the time they had finished adorning me, I was singing, too.
I rose out of the waves. Light caught the spray of droplets, creating a thousand tiny prisms of color. Crooning my heart out with eternal angst, I was consumed with emotion. I had to sing.
This was the most poignant song ever written and I was the keeper of all the anguish.
Kai stepped out into the clearing and I sang to him. Sang this ageless story
that was our tale. About misunderstanding. About confession. And this burning need to know.
I walked out of the water and took Kai’s hands. Enfolded him in my arms then returned us to the pond. I sank with him beneath the waves into this place of air, my voice raised in lyrical pleading to show me that sign.
That’s when Kai tickled me.
As I started to laugh and could no longer sing, I realized that I was drowning him—not in air but in cold water—while burbling Britney Spears lyrics off- key, tears falling from my eyes like an overwrought teenybopper.
Jack hadn’t attacked me, psychologically or otherwise. No, he’d put me under the spell of the sirens and then made me their lead singer in an attempt to take Kai out. Thankfully, it hadn’t worked.I stumbled out of the pond and said casually, “Well, that was awkward.”

PURCHASE LINKS


ABOUT the AUTHOR

Tellulah Darling
noun
1. YA Novelist
2. Alter ego of former screenwriter and instructor
3. Sassy minx

Geeks out over: cool tech.
Squees for: great storytelling.
Delights in: fabulous conversation.
Writes about: where love meets comedy. Awkwardness ensues.


AUTHOR LINKS

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2 comments:

Giselle said...

Thanks for being on the tour! :)

Tellulah Darling said...

Thanks so much for hosting My Ex From Hell today on your lovely blog! :)